Maero
by Inmate XIV
Summary: The retelling of the time period between Xion's death and Roxas's battle with Riku. What was he doing? What was he thinking? Happy belated RokuShi day!


_Roxas…don't be sad. _

He clutches the pink and yellow Thalassa shell in his hand. Slamming his fist against the side of the train station, he can recollect everything that just happened. Xion dying, his memories of her wiped, until it was to late to save her at all.

The last few drops of water leaked out of his eyes, leaving him with a splitting headache that he couldn't understand at all. He shut his eyes tight, thinking that if he held the shell close enough to where his Heart should be, he could will Xion back to life. He knew it wouldn't help any to mourn over it.

_Release Kingdom Hearts…_

That's what she had said. She wanted him to release Kingdom Hearts. If he did…would it bring her back to him. It had to. What other reason would she want him to release it, if it wouldn't bring her back? It had to have some effect on him.

Roxas slipped the shell protectively into his pocket, then summoned his Keyblade. It was no longer a Kingdom Key, but an Oathkeeper, a higher ranked Keyblade. What had happened? Was it suppose to mean something?

Something filled the empty space in his other hand, and when he looked down, there was another Keyblade. It was a plain Kingdom Key, at that moment. Roxas lifted it up and sighed. He could hear faint laughter, almost see Xion smiling over at him on top of the clock tower. He shut his eyes again when the water started forming there. His grip on the handle of her Keyblade tighten instinctively, the last remaining thing besides the shell that showed his connection to her.

Dismissing both Keyblades, he thought a walk around Twilight Town might help him get over his girlfriend's death, but each time he went passed a shop, a house, he kept thinking of her.

_Xion and I use to love to get ice cream there…_

_That's where we found Xion when she couldn't summon her Keyblade anymore…_

_Where we fought our first mission together…_

Roxas wiped his sleeve against his eyes again. Damn water. What the hell was going on?

Axel was going to hate him. Hate him for killing Xion. When Organization XIII found him, they would surely turn him into a Dusk, or kill him. He would have rather been killed. Being turned into a Dusk would make him lose every trace of consciousness. He wouldn't remember anything about himself. He would forget Xion and Axel.

Why had he fought against her. He could have caught up to her and held her, got through to her. Once, when they were leaving Agrabah, Xion' monstrous form had grown weaker, before turning into her original form again. He would run toward her, one hand reaching out to get her. He never would. The Darkness around them would come to fade completely and Xion would disappear before he could even touch her. After he had turned around, he had seen a huge monster, and he knew then Xion wasn't going to give up until one of them was dead. She was, in the end. And it was Roxas's fault.

Roxas pulled the shell out of his pocket and started to toy around with it. It was pink and yellow, looked like one of the shells that Roxas and Xion had exchanged when both had fallen into comas.

_Who else will I have ice cream with?_

So stupid! He was such an idiot! Why had he said that, when he could have told her everything that he had meant to say? It was just so sudden, he'd never really even gotten a chance to ever tell her he loved her. Sure, they had kissed, once, and they held hands sometimes on the clock tower, but that was just about it. They were never allowed to show affection, because Saix said it was fake.

Something bumped Roxas on the shoulder. He turned his head angrily to the spot and found one of the boys that taught Roxas how to play Struggle Matches. The boy wore the same expression on his face as Roxas, frustrated and angry, but then it softened when he saw Roxas's red eyes and the marks the water had left on his cheeks.

"Hey, man, you okay?" The boy asked, reaching toward him. Roxas smacked him away.

"I'm fine," he growled, "Just leave me alone."

The boy, along with the two other children, all gave him strange looks, before running off as if nothing ever even happened. Roxas continued one, hoping to find a place to sleep that night. He was most likely going to have to sleep on the street, knowing Twilight Town well enough.

He looked in a few windows, at the people who were in there, watching a screen, children playing, having dinner. They were all so innocent. Unknowing to the real world around them.

Roxas made his way into the forest, before sitting down next to a tree and tilting his head up. Above the trees, he could barely make out the shapes of stars.

_Xion loved stars…_

Right. She really had. It was so interesting how many times Roxas wouldn't be able to find her, and he would come to Twilight Town and find her laying up on the clock tower, watching the stars. He never asked her why, it was just one of her things.

Roxas looked down at his hands and remembered that the shell was stilled clutched in one of them. This would be the first night ever that he would sleep without knowing that Xion was safe somewhere. He would have to remember in the morning not to go looking for her. She was gone.

He could think that she was safe, in Heaven, or something.

_Back to Sora. _

He was sick of hearing of Sora. Xemnas had talked to him about Sora, saying that he was, "The thing that tie you and Xion together." Roxas still hadn't understood it at all. Xion had said Sora when she had been knocked out on that mission. As he had walked up, he had heard his name escape her mouth.

Roxas shut his eyes, leaning against the tree. He wouldn't let anymore water leave his eyes. It was all just to much. Between all the grief and sorrow, he finally found peace to fall asleep.

When Roxas woke up the next morning, it was raining. The tree wasn't helping at all to shield him from the rain. His hair was pasted against his head, his spikes still naturally staying up, but his bangs sticking to his forehead. He pulled his hood over his head, and opened his hand. The shell was still there.

_Where did the shell come from, again? I can't really remember it clearly…it was from Xio-_

He had to release Kingdom Hearts. It would help get…_her_ back. He needed _her_ back. Now.

* * *

**End. **

**I know it was extremely short, so I'm sorry about that. :P**

**Maero is the Latin for meaning, _To grieve _or _Sorrow. _**

**I hope you liked my little oneshot. I've really been working on it since June 19th, but I didn't really have any inspiration to finish it. It was meant for RokuShi day, so...Happy belated RokuShi day! :D**


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